Author: Greg

I thought Nashville was warm the last few days, but today Atlanta is projected to reach 97°F today… But that’s not the kicker, thanks to the humidity, it’s going to feel around 114°F.

That’s hot, damn hot, so hot in fact you walk outside and think, “you know, I should’ve put deodorant on my balls.” If you’re looking for me, I’ll be curled up beside an AC vent waiting for October to come…

Trust me to go somewhere I wasn’t really supposed to. Yesterday Robyn and I done the whole tourist Nashville thing (or started to anyways) when we went to the Adventure Science Center which is really aimed at kids of all sizes, so we were having fun with all the sciencey stuff when the big kid in me decided to take the little kids route to the top of the building, but hey, there were some adults up there also so I figured it was big kids safe too…

Or was it?

I was able to guide my way up no problem, didnt even hit my big head on low ceilings or anything, but on the way down was a tiny kids foot sized staircase that my big clown feet were to big for and as I planted a clodhopper about halfway down (8 steps at most) my feet just gave way and down I went…

Of course, some kids saw me and looked on in horror as I smacked the metal grating that was the floor, but I was back on my feet quick as a cat pretending I was alright. Once I literally crawled my way down to the ground floor, finding Robyn en route, I took stock of my various injuries, a slightly scraped arm and a bruise on my lower back, other than that I was fine. Then after we left I felt a slight twinge in my neck which over the course of the day and night got worse and worse and worse until this morning I just couldn’t get out of bed. Robyn had scheduled a massage for me the night before but now she wanted to take me to a medical facility, which I was opposed to in my current non-insured lifestyle. But she relented and next thing I know I’m in the nearest hospital to our hotel, the suspiciously named Baptist hospital… So I’m there, full gown on, getting x-rays of my neck and shoulder, worrying about how much money they’ll want for all this hooplah when it’s time to discharge myself from the ER.

After the x-rays, which came pretty quickly as I was the first person into the ER today, a dubious honour if ever there was one, I was left to sit around a sterile room for 2 hours before the doctor came and told me nothing was broken and I could leave now. Thankfully they didn’t ask for anything as we left, and we have no idea when the bill will arrive so we probably have a mountain of debt to look forward to in the not too distant future.

I guess the moral I learned is kids stuff is for kids and small staircases don’t like people with big clown feet. Lucky today only cost a prescription for muscle relaxants and anti-inflammatories and some heat pads to help the muscles heal.

After a 5 and a something something hour drive from Atlanta, we made it to Nashville, TN. by way of Lynchburg, TN. and the Jack Daniels Distillery.

And let it be said that Lynchburg reeks of the hooch, seriously, every corner of that tiny town smells like Jack on the rocks… That aside, we had a fun time poking round the distillery for a short while, we didn’t have time for the tour unfortunately but oh well, we had to be in Nashville for about 5pm as the Weezer/Ben Folds concert opened at 6:30. Cue some moonshine bootlegger getaway driving (complete with soundtrack provided by station 14 on XM Radio) by Robyn and we made it to the hotel by about 5:30, one valet parking later and we were ready to head on over to the Municipal Auditorium to see the show…

We got there looking like hobo’s as we had driven for 5 odd hours and we were greeted by a long ass line that wrapped around the building and security people screaming that no cameras would be allowed into the arena and if you had one, take it back to your car, well, we had two and no car, so we were shit outta luck in that department, so I took Robyn’s slim one and she somehow jammed my bulky one into her purse and we hoped for the best… We get in to the security area and I got in no problem. Seriously, it was a half hearted pat down and a silly question, “do you got any knives?” Hell no… But Robyn got busted with mine, and I was already inside so I couldn’t do much about it… After some pleading they agreed to take the battery and let her in, a $60 battery it must be noted as it’s a Sony camera, but we still had her camera, so all was cool… Or was it?

Ben Folds started after the support band at about 8pm, I took a few shots covertly with Robyn’s camera and I should have really stopped at that, but I got greedy and got busted about 2/3 into the show… The security wanted to take her memory stick, a $100 memory stick it must be noted, and there was no way on Earth I was parting with that (but more of that later on) so I agreed to give up 2 duracell AA’s after deleting all the images I took…

Anyways, Ben and his band rocked, but we were pretty tired, and I was pissed off with security, and we left before Weezer came on which now leads to me my rant about security and their approach to cameras. Sure, they werent allowed, but as I said, we had no car to take them to and screw going back to the hotel and all the hassle around that, but I personally find it to be completely unreasonable to even expect people to part with any of their equipment… Especially now in the digital age. I mean, my camera might be 5 years old, but I’m not going to let anyone take it off me, it was too expensive to simply allow some jobsworth security guard take it and do whatever with it… And to surrender memory sticks is equally unreasonable, if it was a disposable camera then sure, but again, digital equipment cost a fair amount, even for cheap, lesser quality stuff.

It just pisses me off, one saving grace that prevented the arena going into my blackbook of places to avoid was that we found the guard who took my battery as we were leaving and he gave us it back… Saved me $60 (even though I have a spare) so the night wasn’t completely ruined…

Another day, another trip away, this time, as I previously mentioned, I’m off to Nashville, TN. for a long weekend revolving around an awesome double bill concert… Weezer and Ben Folds! LIVE!! ON THE SAME NIGHT!!! IN THE SAME BUILDING!!!!

So I may or may not be around til Sunday, it’s as yet undetermined… Also I’ve been warned not to “get any of that country ‘stanky’ on you. I hear it’ll make you do weird stuff like chew tobacco, and grow a mullet.” Worried? I just might be…