Over North Dakota

Well, my Portland adventure is at an end and I’m on my way back home by way of Minneapolis/St. Paul, MN. Remember I said last time that I’d much rather have an early night as I had an early morning… Didn’t happen, we were in the Boiler Room till 2:30am, it’s a real friendly place, I suggest you go check it out if you’re ever in the Portland area, corner of Davis & 3rd near the Old Town/Chinatown MAX stop. At this point I’d like to thank Tiffany, Lara, Jason, Shauna, Brad, Clarissa, Guy, Brandy, Tiffany’s mom and dad and everyone else whose names I forget for a really good time.

So yeah, good times, good night, I think my bar tab ended up at about $40… That’s $4 per Amaretto & Coke, you do the math. Surprisingly I felt very much alive when I was forced to wake up at 6:30 after 3½ hours sleep, maybe Amaretto is my poison of choice now, cause there is some people who can drink a drink all night and feel fine in the morning, like my friend Scott, he can knock back Jack Daniels & Cokes like it’s going out of fashion and wake up the next day with no ill effects.

Which is handy, as being hungover on an airplane isn’t high on my list of things to do. So we land in the Land of 1,000 Lakes in about 90 minutes time, temperature on the ground is, I’ve been informed, a snowy 21°F, god knows what that is in °C… VERY cold methinks.

Meanwhile, on a sandy beach somewhere in Barbados, Melody (remember her?) is probably having the time of her life… Talk about contrasting fortunes. Things with Melody are still a bit weird, but at least we’re still talking from time to time and she still puts up with me when I go all weepy over her. I dunno what’s really going on, on one hand I’m still in love with her, on the other, she’s in love with another who basically told her he wasn’t really interested in her. I should move on, but that’s easier said than done, she should move on too.

Anyways, enough about that, I said I wouldn’t talk about that side of my life anymore, and that’s one paragraph too many.

“Money talks,
But it don’t sing and dance and it don’t walk,
But as long as you are here with me,
I’d much rather be,
Forever in blue jeans.”

Neil Diamond, the karaoke singer’s best friend… I really should do that more often as I was really loving my small time in the spotlight, course there are some songs I shouldn’t sing. “Unchained Melody” being one of them. No I didn’t sing it, and I’m glad no one else did as it’s not my favourite song for the most obvious reason. Since I last reported I’ve killed Black Crowes’ “Hard to Handle”, House of Pain’s “Jump Around” though they tried to fool me with putting up the wrong lyrics, “but I ain’t going out like no punk bitch, get used to one style and yo and I might switch”, and finally The Proclaimers (the doleclaimers? Scottish joke) “I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles)” which is always good for crowd interaction… Song’s I put in for but never got a chance to sing were Coldplay’s “Politik” and Aerosmith’s “Dream On” and in retrospect, it was probably for the best.

It’ll be good to get back home to Atlanta and that good ol’ southern comfort, it’s just a bit too cold and wet in the Pacific Northwest for me, which is ironic (dont’cha think?) all things considered, but I do kind of have the travel bug now, there’s so many places I’d love to see and do in the US… Los Angeles, San Francisco, Las Vegas, Grand Canyon, Chicago, closer to home I’d love to catch a game at Turner Field, see a basketball and hockey game at Philips Arena. And I’m sure I’ll get it all done before long.

“I wanna do it all,
See Paris in the fall,
Watch the Yankees play ball,
I wanna take it all in.”

See, I’m not even in Minneapolis yet and I’m jonesing for some country music, Erika would be most happy with that. It’s all she’ll be happy about after my spot of vacational procrastination. Don’t ask, I’ve just lost my ability to write…

And before you say “so what do you think you’re doing now? Dumbass!” I’ll explain…

This isn’t creative writing in anyway shape or form, it’s just me reporting on my life and events that surround it, it takes next to no brain power at all to do. Creative writing on the other hand is totally different… I would explain further but I can’t be bothered… Anyways, I was set a task to do, just a little one and on paper it looked pretty easy… Write one or two paragraphs in the personality of a celebrity, the subject would be my own choosing… And I thought and I thought and I thought and I thought and I contacted a few friends for inspiration and they thought and they thought and they contacted their friends for ideas and we all came up with nothing, nada, zip in terms of a subject.

And even if I did have a set subject matter, I was struggling to think of how I’d write it in the style of someone else I don’t know well enough to know where to begin. So this went on and on for days on end and now I was well past my deadline when I handed in a very incoherant stream of consciousness.

Yes, I wrote it in my no-brainer blog style.

So Erika will not be happy with me, not that she’s ever really happy with me, busting my chops is her second favourite past-time after ripping into me or whupping my candy ass, so needless to say I’m not expecting hugs at Hartsfield Airport tonight.